HE'S SKEDADDLED! HE'S DISAPPEARED! HE'S MAGICKED HIMSELF AWAY!
(continued) AH, AND INDEED'N HE HAS! MAGICKED AWAY. . . MAGICKED AWAY. . . THE MAN WAS MAGIC! BLACK MAGIC! HE WAS AN AWFUL MAN! BESET BY SATAN HIMSELF! WHA TIS THAT THEN? (Pointing to a movement under the Dragon)
From the Brigands' point of view we see a lump moving under the cloth of the collapsed Dragon.
Close-up on the moving lump and we see flies circling over the top of it. The lump stops for a moment - the flies buzz - and it wriggles along a little further.
IT MUST BE HIM! THE MAN HIMSELF! THE MAGICIAN!
. . . TACKLE HIM!
In forty flying tackles, all the Brigands converge on the lump.
Like air in a partially-filled balloon, the lump squeezes free of their weight and starts to wiggle away.
HE'S OVER THERE NOW! THERE HE IS!
Again, all forty Brigands converge on the lump in a flying tackle.
Again, the lump squirts away.
Cut to the Cobbler, crouching in anticipation of the lump which is moving his way.
(nearby, concerned) CAREFUL TACK. HE'S TRICKY!
(protecting Bubba) BUBBA, YOU'VE DONE ENOUGH
Cut to the Brigands.
HE'S OVER THERE! THERE HE IS!
The Brigands tackle the lump once more. It shoots forward, squeezed from under them, "travels along a little bit until it is under the head of the Dragon. The absurdly deflated Dragon head rises like a goofy version of its former self and from out of its mouth shoots the Thief, running at top speed, carrying the balls in front of him, holding his robe like an apron, his scrawny legs pumping. He runs headlong into the Cobbler - SMAC K !
The Cobblerls arms encircle the Thief in an involuntary reaction. The Thief pulls desperately away, and the Cobbler snatches the Balls from him.
The Brigands halt in mid-pursuit when they see they are not chasing ZigZag.
BUT THAT'S NOT THE MAGICIAN! WHO IS IT? IT'S NOT HIM! LET HIM GO! LEAVE THE POOR DEVIL BE!
We see the Cobbler standing among the Brigands holding the Golden Balls and far behind him, the Thief is skittering away toward the City. The Brigands react in amazement at the Cobbler holding the Balls.
WE'VE DONE IT MEN! WE'VE GOT THE BALLS!
HE'S GOT THEM!
AND ISN'T HE LOOKING WELL!
THE MAN! THE MAN HAS THEM! 'TIS THE MAN HIMSELF HAS THEM!
MY WONDERFUL COBBLER!
Cut to YumYum, running toward the Cobbler, shouting:
YOU'VE SAVED THE CITY! YOU'VE GOT THE BALLS BACK! I LOVE YOU!
Cut to the Cobbler, delighted and embarrassed as YumYum throws
her arms around his neck and kisses him.
All the Brigands shout:
HOORAY FOR OUR SIDE!
AND ISN'T SHE
ROY AL GUARD! WE HAS WON THE BATTLE! ESCORT THEM TO THE PALACE!
The cheering Brigands lift YumYum and the Cobbler up on their shoulders and begin to march toward the City.
Dissolve to the Palace wall, cheering soldiers at each crenel and King at the centre crenel with his arms held out in welcome.
We see a victorious procession, led by the Royal Brigands Guard, all singing different things. At their head rises Princess YumYum beside the Cobbler, who is carrying the Three Golden Balls. In the midst of the Brigands, comes the Camel carrying Princess MeeMee and Prince Bubba. Behind the Brigands, march the FourEunuchs, followed by the Golden City Army. This is a symmetrical epic procession, passing through crowds of cheering people.
Cut to the shadows. Out comes the Thief, poking his head into the sunlight and looking around. As the procession advances, he skitters across the drawbridge and into the Palace.
King Nod, wide awake, sitting on his throne, flanked by his daughters and Prince B ubba. MeeMee is combing Prince Bubba IS new blond hair. The Cobbler is laying the Three Golden Balls down in front of him. He steps back and bows awkwardly. The Brigands are lined up behind him, standing at attention and looking extremely proud with their chests thrust forward.
OUR CITY IS SAVED! THE PROPHECY IS FULFILLED! MY CITY OWES YOU A GREAT DEBT OF GRATITUDE, o COBBLER.
Princess YumYum bends to whisper into the King's ear.
FA THER. . . FA THER. . .1. .. (whisper, whisper)
Cut to an enormous cheering crowd of people, gathered at the base of the tallest minaret. There is a tremendous celebration, musicians, dancing, flowers, fountains.
The Eunuchs chant on a platform in front of the minaret.
(zipping from pant leg to pant leg) LONG LIVE THE GOLDEN CITY!
Eunuch 1: Eunuch 2: Eunuch 3:
LONG LIVE THE GOLDEN (in harmony)
Eunuch 4: All Four:
They repeat their chant as the populace joins in and the symphonic sound track swells up.
The camera pans up the minaret and at the first large window we see King Nod beside the Pink Palanquin, kissing the large purple female hand extended from inside its curtains. We hear the familiar husky giggle and the folds of the curtain jiggle. The King chortles. He is interrupted from the side. Goblet rubs his hands and bows.
o GREAT KING NOD! HAVE NO FEAR! GOBLET, YOUR GRAND VIZIER IS HERE!
Looking at Goblet in disgust, the King claps his hands
The two card-like guards appear.
REMOVE HIM. . . PERMANENTLY!
The guards pick up Goblet and exit him.
(pleading) BUT I ONLY WANTED TO HELP - YOUR MAJESTY!
( continued) I WAS ONLY DOING IT FOR YOU - YOUR GRACE. I WISH ONLY TO SERVE! . . .
The King chortles to himself, and the maiden's arm or foot comes out and tickles him under the chin. The King slaps the hand or foot and it is withdrawn and the King chuckles to himself delightedly - he can take it or leave it.
The music modulates to a higher key.
Pull out slightly and pan up to another window. We see Princess MeeMee in white with flowers round her neck and Prince
Bubba sitting side by side, each holding a hand-mirror, cooing contentedly. MeeMee has a small mirror, looking at herself, and Prince Bubba has a large mirror with which he is gazing at his twinkly blue eyes and curly blonde hair.
Pri ncess MeeMee:
I LOVE YOU.
At these magic words the Princels blonde hair goes ping and implodes slightly into a more normal size man's hairdo. Princess MeeMee sees this and says
I LOVE YOU!
At this, there is another magical implosion and part of the Prince's head assumes a more normal size. MeeMee sees what is happening and she exclaims joyously
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU.
At each "I Love YOU" the Prince magically transforms further towards a normal man.
I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!
I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!
I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!
Now Bubba is turning into the most magnificent man imaginable. He is devastatingly beautiful. The Princess is beside herself with joy. She was right all along.
Prince Bubba, now fully aware of what has happened joins the ecstatic MeeMee. (He speaks in Warren Beatty's voice):
Prince B ubba :
I LOVE YOU.
A large choir joins the ringing bells. We pull out and pan up to a third window as the music swells, modulating to a higher key. We see Princess YumYum and the Cobbler. YumYum is also in white with flowers round her neck.
I LOVE YOU!
She moves to kiss him but the tacks are in the way. . .
(removing the tacks from his mouth and straightening up to his full height. He is a tall man. He speaks in Sean Connery's voice.)
I . . .
Pull back and pan up past the onion dome to the Three Golden Balls gleaming in the sun, gold on peacock blue.
The camera zooms rapidly back, taking in the whole minaret and part of the Palace below. The words liTHE END" appear in glittering jewelled letters, precious stones, as the music reaches its climax, bells ringing, voices singing - the compleat old-fashioned ending.
At the side of the screen, the Thief's head (with flies) appears. He sneaks out and puts each jewelled letter inside his coat. Then he looks around the screen for something else to steal. He starts to tug at the edge of the film frame. The soundtrack goes peculiar and sputters as he pulls the film sprockets out of the projector and the music shuts off. We see he is literally stealing the picture. The film winds up very fast and he stuffs it inside his coat, stands for a second on the white background, looks at the audience, grins, turns and runs into the distance and disappears.